Fathers Provoke Not

In Colossians 3:21 we read, "Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged." Many fathers today are guilty of this sin and they may not even realize it. But whether they realize it or not, the Bible teaches that each person is to be a good steward of that which is entrusted to him (Matt. 25; 1 Cor. 4:2). Every father is entrusted with the soul of his children. A good father would want to give his children the best chance to succeed in this life , as well as in the life to come. The Bible teaches that parents are responsible for their children, and it also teaches principles for successful child rearing. In Ephesians 6:4 we read, "And, you fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord." This task requires discipline, love, and encouragement.

Discipline

Proper discipline is required in raising children. "Chasten your son while there is hope, and do not set your heart on his destruction" (Proverbs 19:18). Discipline does not mean abuse. It should be administered out of love and concern for the child's well being, never out of anger or without cause. Let the punishment fit the offense, but don't let the offense go unpunished. Remember that "He who spares his rod hates his son" (Proverbs 13:24). Discipline is not always pleasant, but it is the right thing to do. In the first four chapters of 1 Samuel We read of Eli, a powerful man, but one who did not discipline his sons. God was displeased at this and punished him as well as the nation of Israel for his sin. God will also punish those who disobey His commands today. Discipline teaches children to respect authority, and they must respect the authority of God and of His word in order to get to heaven. Fathers, please do not provoke your children by failing to give them the discipline that they need.

Love

Children also need love, as do all humans. But, sadly, many are not given the love that they need by their father. Fathers must avoid favoring one child over another, as this leads to jealousy and bitterness between siblings. In Genesis 37 the brothers of Joseph hated him because their father loved him more than them. This hatred finally led to the brothers selling Joseph into slavery. A father must realize that each of his children need his time and affection. And love is much more than working 60 hours a week and bringing home a paycheck. Children are precious and their souls are more valuable than any earthly possessions (Mark 8:36-37). Each will be judged according to his works (Rom. 2:6; Rev. 20:12). Fathers, please do not provoke your children by failing to give them the love that they need.

Encouragement

Finally children need encouragement from their fathers. They need to know that they are worth something in this world. Talk with them and give them time. Don't be aggravated when they ask you "Why this?" or "Why that?" Remember that God has given you an opportunity to help mold a young mind and guide that mind toward Him. Jesus said "Let the little children come to me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God,"(Mark 10:14). Also "to whom much is given, from him much will be required..."(Luke 12:48). Fathers, you have been given the responsibility to care for a young soul which will live on for eternity in one place or another. Child rearing is not strictly "women's work," but is the dual responsibility of both parents. This is why the fathers are specifically mentioned in Ephesians 6:4 and Colossians 3:21. Children need the guidance, direction, and godly example of a good father to help them succeed. Don't get caught up in the rat race of life, slow down and give the children some time and energy. What could be more important?